The Sipping Duck

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Who's angry?

Over lunch yesterday, my boyfriend told me that he thinks I should go to a Life in the Spirit Seminar (LSS). I asked why and he said “Because you have so much anger in you.” I was stumped because I knew he was right. Looking back, I didn’t have anger issues. I was a pretty quiet person, choosing to keep the anger to myself. I guess things started to turn around when I went to college. I found my voice. Now, I am easily angered and worse, I brood over it. It takes days for me calm down. During those angry moments, I turn into a hurricane vowing to destroy everything in my path. The smallest inconvenience is turned into a major issue as far I’m concerned. I become incredibly impatient, mean and exacting. Sure, I can laugh about something every now and then but as soon as I see something I can hammer down to the ground, believe me, I will do that with an intensity to match hurricane Katrina. I don’t go around picking fights but if one comes my way, my thinking is, let’s get it on! People say Forgive and Forget. I can easily say I forgive you but truth is, I will never forget what you’ve done. I am vengeful. They say that being vengeful is bad for your soul. I really don’t know. I do try to control my anger and the desire to challenge my opponents upfront by thinking that it’s just not worth my time. I decide to turn right instead of left and during those times when I am just boiling with anger, I turn to my boyfriend. Sometimes he calms me down (he treats me like a baby), other times he slams me into realizing the futility of my anger (which makes me angry at him too). Either way, he’s the voice of reason.

LSS. The thought is making me angry.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home